THE SANCTUARY
GREATER DAYTON INTERGROUP
P.O. BOX 1919, DAYTON OH 45401-1919
Inside This Edition:
Page 2.....Meeting Profiles and Picks
Page 2.....Intergroup Notes
Page 3.....Step 3 Claudia
Page 4.....First Time Mike J
Page 5.....Hello Out There In TVLand
Page 6.....Listen
Page7......Surender To A Higher Power
Page 7.....A Whole New Life
Page 8......A Prayer
Page 8.......Restore Me to Sanity
Page 8.......A Special Workshop!
Each
month The Sanctuary works on two steps.
In the next issue we will work on Steps 5 and 6. If you are working on Steps 5-12 please send
in an article we will save it until the appropriate issue. And........Of course it goes without saying
that we take other articles as well folks, so lets get ’em in and keep “dem”
presses roll’n, YA-HA!
Notes From The Editor:
Well, it’s time for another issue. As you can see, it looks different
again. It will probably look different
every time. I like the idea of
designing a different header each month.
It lets me create, and it lets me procrastinate a day or so while I try
to make the word processor do what I want. Hey! Why not? I can
try! Even the word processor wants me
to let go and let it do the work it’s way.
Trouble is I don’t always know it’s ways; and I just hate to read the
manual until the dad-burned thing is about to self-destruct, or I am screaming
and pulling my hair out. It isn’t
pretty and I don’t recommend we tape it or anything. Not really. I am always
fully dressed to the nines-- pumps on my feet and press card in my hat. My computer manners are magnificent,
too. I’ll let you decide what to believe. LOL.
I had a lot of fun writing the first issue
for you, and I am looking forward to
this one, too.
I am gratefully still sober and that’s a
miracle. I have learned many good
things in these two months from God and my sponsors. The first thing I learned is to expect a miracle when you ask for
one. When I was floundering miserably,
sick and tired of being sick and tired, I asked my HP to send the people into
my life who could help me. And Lo and
Behold, He did just that. These folks
have been helping me to grow emotionally, spiritually and physically. There have been days where it is very
joyful, and there have been days when it has been painful to the quick. But in the long run, it has been worth it.
Claudia
The Silence Is Broken
I sit here in silence calming my mind
Hoping
my muscles will unwind.
I sit here in silence scratching my head
Thinking
of things I should do instead.
I sit here in silence - my life is a mess
Too
tired to move - too tired to dress.
I sit here in silence my hands in a race
To
wipe the tears from my face.
I sit here in silence knowing I should pray
For
the guidance to live this day.
I sit here in silence - it's so loud in my
head
My
disease is screaming - it wants to be fed.
I sit here in silence thinking of things
I
jump with fright as the telephone rings.
The silence is broken with the sound of a
voice
Telling
me today I have a choice.
I sit here in silence all alone
Thanking
God someone used the phone!
Kathy
H.
HUGS AND KUDOS
Thanks to all of the groups who are
supporting the Sanctuary by purchasing subscriptions. It is wonderful and we appreciate all of the support. If your group would like to support us
please call me or E mail me.
Hugs go out to
Peggy anonymously, also to Mike from an anonymous source, and Gheryl. Gather around, lock arms, and give them a
big old squeeze!!!!! Yikes that’s
enough over there, you’ll kill ‘em!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
MEETING PROFILES AND PICKS
Wright Library, 1776 Far Hills Ave.
Oakwood,OH, Friday 12 noon.
This
is a new meeting and well worth attending.
It is a Big Book Study. The
group is using a set of tapes and then discussing them weekly. It is a really great meeting.
Englewood-Englewood Gov’t center-333 W.
National Rd. This meeting is on Monday
at 7:00 P. M. The meeting is looking
for support. So if you can make it over
to the meeting it would be appreciated.
St. Marks-Friday night-456 Woodman Drive,
Dayton OH. (2nd floor). 6:30 P. M.
If you have a meeting that you would like
to promote, please let me know. A brief
synopsis of what is going on would be appreciated. E-mail me.
msquixie@cs.com
INTERGROUP NOTES:
The Dayton Intergroup met on January 14th in
the upstairs room at St. Marks.
There was a good turn out for the
meeting. It was chaired by Tim.
Reports were given from the hotline by
Cheryl M. She still has an opening on
Sunday night to retrieve messages and make calls. If you are interested in picking the service work up, please
contact Cheryl.
The Sanctuary announced it’s continued
effort to sell subscriptions to the paper to both group meetings and
individuals. You can subscribe by
mailing your $5.00 payment to Claudia Ioanes, 1656 Lanbury Dr. Kettering, OH 45439. Groups may call and make an arrangement with
me if they wish to at 298-8216.
Region V reported that Tim H. And Becky C.
will be going to Ft. Wayne on March 10 and 11.
Becky will be looking for a person to share a room with. Region V is helping to organize the 2000
region conference. Chris and Claudia
will be volunteering to find information on hotels, etc.
Service and Tradition Workshop - the group
voted to bring Pam G. to Dayton for the workshop on April 15th. Please make a note on your calendar and plan
to support this function.
Public Information - Packets have been sent
out to Dr.’s in the area as well as schools.
Marcie volunteered to call schools and see if we can participate in
their health fairs and to check on the cost of this.
Old Business - The bookstore issue of
whether or not it was necessary to rid the store of non-conference approved
literature was brought up again. After
a heated discussion it was put to a vote.
With seven people for and 13 people against, it was decided that there
would be no second vote. Frank
brought up a new point in case that the bookstore was originally privately
funded and thus not part of Intergroup.
It was motioned and passed that this subject not be brought up for four
years and was passed. This left the
Intergroup with the task of researching the bookstore’s history. Paula, Paty and Frank volunteered to do the
research.
New Business - Updated meeting lists are
needed and all information should be sent to Doe. Tim advised that the officers meet once a month and if a person
wishes to be on the agenda it will be necessary to contact one of them. Marcie motioned to close the meeting, it was
seconded and ended with prayer.
Step 3
Step 3 Prayer
“God, I offer myself to Thee, to build with me and to do with me as
Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of
self, that I may better do Thy will.
Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to
those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always.”
For me step 3 has been a very hard step,
harder than any that I have worked thus far.
I think the reason it is hard for me is; that I don’t like the first
sentence of this prayer in my realm of reality. I don’t like the idea of anyone doing what they will with me,
not even God. So, I must ask myself;
Why? What makes giving up control so
hard? You know the easy thing, the
first thing that pops into my head is I don’t know. However, that is a cop out.
I do know--I just don’t want to think about it or face it. When I give up control, I am giving up
self-defeat. My HP only works with
success! And frankly defeat can be a
drug, just like the food. Defeat is so
easy it requires no effort on my part.
It also allows me to gain sympathy, still another drug, and it affords
me the luxury of never reaching out to battle this disease with my HP at my
side.
He won’t demand success from me. Instead He patiently waits at the sideline
until I am willing to have him shape me and mold me into the creature that he
intended me to be.
The third step also requires me to pray for
self-bondage to be released in me. Whew
that means that I also need to ask and be ready to stop focusing upon myself as
the greatest thing since hair was invented, and concentrate on my fellow
man. That’s not easy either. My disease likes to be the center of
attention, as well as the rest of my ego driven behaviors. The problem with that is that when I am
concentrating on myself I begin to spiral downward, when I concentrate on
serving my fellows I spiral upward. So,
even though I don’t like the idea of being helpful it is necessary if I am
going to stay sober for another day. (When I use the word sober, I use it in
the context that when I am living in my disease, my behavior is a drunken type
behavior. When I am living in the
solution, my behavior becomes sober and rational.)
Lastly, the third step allows me to pray
for relief from my difficulties so that I can bear witness to others. It kind of sets me up for the twelfth step
which will send me out to into the word to carry the message to others who
still suffer.
And in the end I ask that I be permitted
to do God’s will always. That is about
being open at the beginning of the day to the ways in which God works through
me. Each day it is different. Some days I know His will--if it is a
question of should I steal this pepper shaker?
I know He doesn’t like that.
Other days, it is not as clear--if the question is what shall I do about
a hard situation I am facing in my life.
When that is the case I then turn to God in prayer and begin talking
with my sponsors and other significant’s that he has put in my path. Armed with those aides, the right way comes
forth.
All of this does not make it simple for
me to give my will to my HP. Knowing
deep in my heart with each release of control I will move closer, to a serene
place, where I do not have to have control of food, people, places, things, and
outcomes. I can rest and know He is God
and He has a plan, which will be GOOD!
Claudia
FIRST TIME
When I went to a meeting the other day,
there was a new member there. It made
me think about my own first meeting, only a few months ago.
I remember the fear and anxiety I felt. I remember
the other two people that showed up for the meeting. One, I have since named my
OA Mom, the other has been a great source of knowledge and inspiration. They
took their time in that meeting to help me understand what was going on, how it
worked, and made me feel really welcome. It was a step meeting and they decided
to break the normal order of readings and read the first step, to help me get
started. I am certain that my Higher
Power was working overtime that day.
I have been to a lot of meetings since, I
have read the printed sheets and the steps, I have spoken my burning desires, I
have made many new friends and much more.
I hope that I never forget that first
meetings, that I can give to new members a least a little of what was given to
me that day. To help them feel welcome and help them get started on the roads
to recovery. Mike J.
Step 4
This past December I decided to do a fourth
step as part of my yearly housecleaning process. It was highly recommended to me by my sponsor.
I
believe he could see that I had a lot of resentments and that I didn’t know how
to process them. He suggested using
the Big Book as my format. I had never used it before so, that made it a little
tougher. I like doing things in
familiar ways.
I received so many blessings out of doing
this step this time and in this way.
One way that I was blessed was in learning to sit down and find out
exactly what my part was or is in a situation.
I never did that before. This is
still so hard for me and I am not confident every time I look for my part; but,
I think my HP blesses the effort to look and my willingness to improve.
Something very valuable surfaced during
this latest fourth step. I learned that
I spend a great deal of time being angry at people, places and things. I had no idea! This anger is one of the poisons that sends me to the brink of
overeating. It is also the same poison
that sets my nerves on edge. It makes
me sick (physically, emotionally and spiritually) and my life becomes unhappy
and more unproductive with each addition of anger to my life.
Last week I spent a good deal of my time
being angry at my significant other and my daughter. I felt each had hurt me.
And, of course, the hurt--being that I am a spiritual infant--was
MONUMENTAL. By the end of two days my
leg was in such pain, the muscles felt frozen.
I realized that it was going to take a fourth step action and some
conversation with my sponsors to relieve me and get me back on course. I finally felt better after discussing it
and writing about it in a fourth step and in my journal.
You see, I had allowed myself to slip into
a very comfortable role--the role of the victim. Everyone is after me, on my back and of course not understanding
me. I also believe that everything is
my fault when I get into this mode. I
become self-serving. This is a place I
need to stay away from. When I start to
feel sorry for myself, I begin to shut down emotionally and suppress
feelings. In turn, that brings on the
temptation to eat compulsively.
The other thing that I learned was that
there are prayers within the fourth step that I can use to help me grow. The first prayer is in the Big Book on page
67. “When a person has offended us we
said to ourselves, “This is a sick man.
How can I be helpful to him? God
save me from being angry. Thy will be
done.” This prayer helps me to be able
to let go of the wrongs that I think people are committing. Not everyone I know is sick; but there are a
few people that I am involved with that I must say this in order to keep a sane
perspective. These people need my
prayer, not my anger or my retaliation.
Those things only hurt me.
The next prayer is on page 69. “...mold our ideals and help us to live up
to them.” At first I didn’t think that
applied to me. However, on closer look
it does. Are my motives selfish around
any subject? Many times they are. I want my way and my way has gotten me in
trouble many times. I can ask my HP to
mold ideals within me that I can be proud of.
The last prayer is found on page 70. “We earnestly pray for the right ideal, for
guidance in each questionable situation, for sanity and the strength to do the
right thing.” This area allows me to get in touch with
the new vision I have set for myself. I
feel that I shouldn’t wait for my HP to send the right ideal, but to establish
it and work toward it with the understanding that if it is not what my HP
desires for me he will make changes in time.
Also the strength to do the right thing; that is tough. It is so much easier for me to continue
doing what I have been doing as I spoke of in the third step. It is easier to fail than to be successful
for me sometimes.
In closing I believe that I learned a lot
about myself during this last fourth step.
I learned to take some responsibility, to love myself and to cut myself
some slack. Sometimes I am too hard on
myself.
Claudia
It is better over there--more action at
that table, that group, that city, that country. Ah, if only I were there I’d feel better.
What an old idea! Where I live is inside; nothing on the outside changes that. Yes, I can find a distraction, a place to
look within; take an inventory, make an amends, a twelfth-step call. Wherever I go, Tibet or Timbuktu, Mt.
Everest or the moon, I take myself with me.
Do I like the company?
For Today:
Through this program I am regaining the zest and enthusiasm for life
that is my birthright.
For
Today Pg. 27
Tradition Twelve
Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our
traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.
How can I
put this tradition into use in my personal life today? (this would be a great a
great topic for an article. If someone can help us out please send it in!)
HELLO OUT THERE IN TVLAND!!
The hour(s) I spend in front of the television allows
me to “vegetate.” I have no cares or
worries! All I have to do is sit and
stare into a box that tells me how to dress, think, play, and eat. I can “press a button” to decide what
emotion I wish to “feel”….comedy/laughter, drama/tears, sci-fi/fear, etc. The Easier, softer way!
OR
The hour(s) I spend in front of the Big Book, O.A.’s 12
and 12, and Just For Today I can work on Spiritual, Emotional and Physical
healing. Thank goodness I have choices!
CABLE-TV PROGRAM 12-STEP
PROGRAM
WHIO: Dayton,
Channel 7
When Humility Is Occurring
WDTN: Dayton,
Channel 2
What Did That Numb
BET BET: Becoming Entirely Trainable
CNN CNN: Confronting Negative Nonsense
GAC GAC: Graciously Accepting Change
HBO HBO: Honestly Believing Ourselves
MTV MTV: Miracles To Value
QVC QVC: Quickly Verbalizing Chaos
TNN TNN: Taking Notice Now
USA USA: Using Sponsors Abundantly
LIFETIME LIFETIME
DISCOVERY DISCOVERY
THE LEARNING CHANNEL THE
LEARNING CHANNEL
Kathy H
..............I LISTEN ....I AM
STILL..........
DAY AFTER DAY I COME
TO YOU & PRAY...
THAT I UNDERSTAND YOU
AS A LITTTLE CHILD....
WOULD.........&
TO FOLLOW YOUR WILL TODAY.....
IN ALL I DO , HEAR
ME SAY.........
THESE WORDS......MY
DEAR FRIEND.......
&
FATHER.....YOUR PATH HAS NO END......
IN THIS
WORLD......ANYWAY......
I LISTEN TO ALL THAT
YOU SAY...
TO ME......AND TRY
TO FOLLOW YOU.........
SOMETIMES THIS IS
HARD TO DO.....
YOUR ROAD GETS NARROW HERE
AND THERE....I FALL
AND SHED A TEAR...
YOU’RE THERE FOR
HELP WHEN I CRY...
YOU’RE
NAME........I REACH.....YOU SIGH....
AND HOLD OUT TO ME
YOUR HAND......
NOW HERE BEFORE YOU
GOD, I STAND.....
DO WITH ME WHAT THOU
WILL.......
MY GOD.........I
LISTEN ......I AM STILL.......
BY.......P.A.WILZ ....
All Positions for the Hotline have been filled
QUESTIONS FOR STEP 3 AND 4
1. What ways do I use to seek my HP’s guidance for me?
2. In what
areas do I need to work on trust issues with my HP? How will I do that?
3. Am I
earnestly seeking my HP's will for me in all areas of life? How?
Can I do service and share my Experience, Strength and Hope on this
issue in The Sanctuary or by doing a lead?
Step 4
1. Is it time
for me to do a fearless and searching moral inventory?
2. Am I
harboring resentments against someone that I need to pray for today?
3. What are my
fears today? Can I give them to my HP.
4. Have I asked
my HP to mold my ideals?
5. Is my
self-will holding me back from a relationship with my HP? If so in what areas.
OA Birthday And Information Day
On January
29th Becky C. Arranged a great day. In
the morning there was an excellent lead speaker.
The afternoon
was spent talking about OA and hearing
other mini leads.
The speakers
discussed how they came to OA and how their programs have changed.
Thanks to everyone who came and who participated in
the day. It was a wonderful day.
WHAT I DO EVERYDAY IS PRETTY SIMPLE, BUT THE KEY FOR
ME IS TO DO IT EVERYDAY.
Step 3
SURRENDER TO A HIGHER POWER
As I sit down
to write a little on the third step I think of how far I have come and how much
I learned. One thing I have learned is
that this is a step I need to do on a daily basis. At times it is a step I must do at each meal. All I know is that for me the act of
surrendering my will to my Higher Power has given me both serenity and hope
that I can live my life with sanely around food most days.
A recent
awareness about my food plan has brought me back to this step yet again. Changes can
very scary for me, but the difference now is that I have worked this
step and I know that turning my will over to the care of my Higher Power does
restore me to my Higher Power.
What I do
everyday is pretty simple, but the key for me is to do it no matter what. First I work step one and two and then I
pray to my Higher Power in my own words.
I used the Big Book prayer as a guide.
I ask my Higher Power to help me to follow His will not mine and I ask
to be a good listener. A lot of the
answers as to how to do His will are available to me if I just shut up and
listen. I am still trying to learn that
skill, but I am getting better.
Amazing things are in store for me everyday that I am able to work this step. Abstinence is one of those things and I am very grateful to be able to receive that gift.
L.H.
No matter which way you
decide to go Remember toKeep It Simple
Step 4
THE BEGINNING OF A WHOLE NEW LIFE!
To work step
4, we have to open our minds and remember we are number 1. Our priority is to get well. To recover.
Step 4 brings
us to a lot of “housecleaning.”
This step
requires a lot of writing which will help us to do a thorough examination.
When I put my
pen to paper and give my thoughts to my H P my 4th step is on it’s way. The spiritual strength will guide me
through. We will be honest and be
willing to do so.
We know we
will not be judged or ridiculed. Our
sponsor will guide us with gentle love and understanding.
We will know
freedom as never felt before.
God will
continue to walk the walk with us. The
road to recovery is just ahead.
Love, Paula W.
CALAMITY TURNS TO SERENITY
TOPICS CONCERNING STEP 4
1. PERSONAL
INVENTORY
2.
RESENTMENTS
3. ANGER
4.
FEAR/ANXIETIES
5. HONESTY
6 FREEDOM
7.
WILLINGNESS
8. TRUST
9. MAKING
AMENDS
10. GUIDANCE BY
OUR HP
DEAR FATHER,
MY STRENGTH, MY HOPE MY GARDENER.........
HELP ME TODAY, GIVE ME POSITIVE
THOUGHTS, & FEELINGS.....SHOW YOUR WILL TO ME......BE BY MY SIDE TODAY
& WALK WITH ME THROUGH THESE WAKING HOURS....
PLEASE GOD, GRANT ME MORE STRENGTH
TODAY,THAN YESTERDAY, TO IMPROVE MYSELF IN SOME WAY.....SPRINKLE ME WITH YOUR
WISDOM, SO I WILL GROW....
WEED AWAY MY WORRIES &
PROBLEMS........FERTILIZE MY ROOTS WITH YOUR LOVE........I WILL THEN HAVE YOUR
STRENGTH TO HELP ME BLOOM !!..........
I NEED TENDING LORD, IN MY GARDEN
ARE MANY
WEEDS........WORRY......HURT.......ANGER.........FEARS...PRIDE.....DISTRUST........PAIN........PLEASE
LORD .....REMOVE THESE WEEDS......AND PLANT SEEDLINGS OF SERENITY ..PEACE,
LOVE, ACCEPTANCE, FORGIVENESS & UNDERSTANDING...........
MAKE SURE YOU REMOVE THE FEAR
.....GOD.......THAT ONE REALLY SPREADS FAST .........IT CHOKES THE BEAUTIFUL
SPROUTS OF PEACE AND SERENITY......AND IT CROWDS MY UNDERSTANDING &
ACCEPTANCE........
WITH YOUR HELP & GUIDANCE, I
WILL GROW & BLOOM IN YOUR WILL FOR ME...........I WILL REFLECT YOUR LOVE
FOR ME, TO ALL I SEE TODAY..........
WHEN YOU SHINE YOUR WARM RAYS OF
LOVE DOWN ON THESE SEEDLINGS & SEND SHOWERS OF STRENGTH, & WHEN YOU
TEND THE PROBLEM OF THE WEEDS, I HAVE
BUT ONE CHOICE.........TO GROW IN YOUR WARMTH AND LOVE.................
THANK YOU GOD, JUST FOR TODAY
& FOR BEING MY
GARDENER...........WATCH ME GROW AND
BLOOM........
q BY
P.A.WILZ....
Restore Me to Sanity
Restore me to
sanity? Who’s insane? Surely not me!! All I have is this “small” problem with overeating, or so I
thought 'til I worked the questions in the workbook.
I began to
see that food is just food, but what I did with it was Crazy!! One day I really over did it on sweets and
when I was driving home later that evening I began feeling dizzy and thought I
might pass out. Not exactly anything
that I want to share with my family or friends outside of OA. They don’t have any idea what I am talking
about. There was another night that I
drove from convenience store to convenience store, buying goodies and eating
them while I drove into the wee hours of the morning. I was a junk food junkie, a food addict and a sugar addict. I realize now that I still am; even though I
don’t do these things anymore. I am
only a bite away from a binge.
I need to
surrender my food and my illusion of control each day as part of my morning
meditation. I work the first three
steps everyday as often as I need to. I
have always been a very serious person, dotting every “I” and crossing every
“T” to perfection. These steps have
helped me to let go of the junk food and on most days I am able to eat three
moderate meals with a planned snack in between.
The weight is
coming off slowly this time. I think
that I’ll just keep on doing the steps and the food work and leave the results
to my HP.
SERVICE AND TRADITION’S
WORKSHOP!!!
SATURDAY April 15, 2000
9:00 'TIL 2:30 PM
ST. MARK’S EPISCOPAL CHURCH
THE LEAD WILL BE GIVEN BY GUEST
SPEAKER PAM G. FOLLOWED BY THE WORKSHOP
SUGGESTED DONATION $5.00
TO COVER THE COST OF THE
SPEAKER